Water... Water...

Been wondering when another of those nifty Flash animations by our ingenious artists will arrive? Well, wait no more, because the newest Reality Syndicate Intro Animation is here. Click here to take a look at this exquisite rendition of dry, blistering heat: Experience the wonder and amazement of walking through an endless desert, only to find... well, whatever. Just watch now.

And You Thought They Were Inanimate...

With Drivel Days behind us we can now say hello to our newest mascot, or rather, mascots! Here are Perry the Baseball and Fresnel the Bat. These two are really into hockey and know basketball trivia like nobody's business. They throw some of the greatest Superbowl parties known to man. For some reason, however, they don't care too much for baseball. Apparently it's "just too slow" or something.

Drivel Days Clean Up Continues

As the celebration drifts further into the past, we here at the Syndicate are left cleaning up after all the guests that came. Only one lamp was broken, so we can say the party was a success! Most of the cleaning is being left to Darren the Drivel Days Dust Pan, as he is best suited for the job. Tomorrow Darren returns to his home in Weehauken, NJ and a brand new mascot hits the Syndicate scene! Don't miss it!

NOOOOOOO!!!! IT'S ALL OVER!!!!

Drivel Days Completed Successfully - Satisfaction and Wailing Agony Overcome Populace

Yes, dear friends, the one-year anniversary of the Syndicate, Drivel Days, has come and gone. But don't be sad - keep that chin up, because the veritable onslaught of new articles is far from over! Yes, the Syndicate is dedicated to flooding you with... well, whatever it is we provide. So stay tuned, and check in often! There is MUCH more to come!

Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Smash Smarties...

Those of you who are fans of Giants: Citizen Kabuto may remember the first Giants review written by Jason Cross a little while ago - well, he's back with more accurate, in-depth analysis of this fantastic game with Giants Review Part Two, a Focus on Mech Weaponry! Take a look to marvel at the incredible attention to detail this well-researched and long-thought-out article presents to its casual, practically undeserving readers. Be amazed here.

Thanks to all Reality Syndicate readers for your continued support, criticism, complaints, and deep-seated resentment. The Syndicate is what it is today thanks in full to its readers - Cheers to all!

AT LONG LAST, ONE YEAR!

Well, we've finally made it. The Syndicate is officially one year old! Today we promised to unveil some new special features, so take a look:

Introducing: The Reality Syndicate Forums

We receive a lot of mail about a lot of things, and our visitors all seem to have one thing in common (they like this site!) Therefore, we present the Reality Syndicate Forums, a truly evolved message board. The forums are still being built, but should be done within days! Read all about it here!

Another Way of Connecting

Some of you out there may have sent us some mail in the past regarding something you liked or disliked. Now, We present the Reality Syndicate Mail Bag. Read all sorts of mail that visitors have sent to us, and soon we'll include some rather nasty, but still entertaining, "hate" mail. Check it out here!

Just What was this Site Like One Year Ago?

If you find yourself wondering this, you may enjoy this page. Click here to take a look at the very first layout and design the Syndicate had, when it had less than ten articles and nothing much more. Why, only 365 days ago this was the Reality Syndicate. We've come a long way, baby.

Wow! We hope all of you enjoyed Drivel Days. Tomorrow we pack up the Christmas lights for a year and things may settle down a little. If you'd like to get in on the second year of the Syndicate visit the Contact Section and we'll post some of your writings!

Here's to another great year.

DRIVEL DAYS ARE ALMOST AT THEIR PEAK!

That's right, tomorrow Drivel Days comes to a close as the Reality Syndicate turns one year old! Be sure to stop by to see what all the hubbub is about regarding the mysterious unveiling...

The Future of Gaming is Here... Today!

Well, that's not entirely true. However, we do have a good view of what's to come for Counter-Strike, the very popular mod for Half-Life. Take a look at some of the newest features on their way in this investigative report. Read it here!

A Milestone Returns to the Spotlight

Who remembers this classic article? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Heh, sorry about that. Anyway, this historic article was actually the very first article written for the Syndicate by beloved writer and co-creator, none other than Chris Clark. "The Army of Nocturnal Egyptian Construction Workers" is so old, it yells at dirt to respect its elders. Read it here!

Tomorrow... just you wait...

DRIVEL DAYS! SOMETHING CLEVER REGARDING DRIVEL DAYS!

Despite the best effors of everyone here at the Syndicate, it seems Drivel Days are continuing. Oh well, might as well enjoy it as much as possible.

Scientist Accuses Colleague of Idiocy - Provides Rebuttal

You may have read Yurivich's article yesterday (again) regarding the fate of the world due to a potato chip purchasing choice. Well, our bitter resident scientist, Dr. S, has provided proof that the original theory is wrong! Read his article here to understand the nature of such things.

A Look Back - WAAAAAY Back!

As all 2 of you die-hard fans may remember, the Reality Syndicate used to be the Daily Drivel, but even then articles such as this one were written regularly. Presenting, from the far corner of the Syndicate vault, the very first article ever written, about God-only-knows-what. Enjoy it here!

Keep up the hawk-like watching, Syndicate fans - there's a lot more still to come.

LOWER BACK PAIN NOT NECESSARILY ALLEVIATED BY DRIVEL DAYS!

There have been no actual reports yet that Drivel Days has helped back pain sufferers (none that were serious anyway). Even though we wait patiently, Drivel Days continues! Check out what's new today:

A Wombat Specialist Applies Mathematical Skills

You may have read Yurivich Gruskenvald's first ever article yesterday when "Why Wombats Don't Like Cheese" was thrust back into the spotlight. Today, surprisingly, Yuri returned to us with a ground breaking report using the principles of the chaos theory. Have you ever wondered whether your decision between Ruffled and Regular potato chips affected the fate of the world? If so, you need to read this article!

Your College Level Physics Classes Were Never This Nonsensical

See this equation to the left? Looks confusing, doesn't it? How would you like to be able to look at a formula like this and immediately understand not only what how to interpret the equation, but how to correct the original mathematician for all the petty errors he made? Read this article, and you too will be saying "A Physics Lesson! Joy!!!"

Oddly, we've already received complaints about the fallacy of Yurivich's report on Chaos Theory and Potato Chips. Perhaps as Drivel Days continues we'll get any errors and complaints cleared up.

CAPS LOCK BUTTON WON"T COME UNSTUCK!

Ignore that stupid headline, folks. Our annoying satire department is working over time. Why? Drivel Days, of course! That's right, we're still running. Today check out the Syndicate Press's first of many new advertisements and take a look back to one of the first Guest Columns:

Another Sappy Reality Show to Hit Prime Time

This summer, don't even think about going on vacation. Don't contact family members, and don't even bathe, because you won't want to miss a second of the new phenomenon that's sweeping the nation. You saw Temptation Island, and now, prepare for Temptation Chessboard!

Wombat Mental Health and You

The Mascot right now may be Darren the Dust Pan, but the all time, year round Syndicate Mascot is none other than Dave the Wombat (pictured here). In this classic Guest Column, read Yurivich Gruskenvald's initial report on why Dave had a strange hatred of cheese in "Why Wombats Don't Like Cheese."

A whole new section to the Syndicate Press came today! What else will Drivel Days bring as the week continues? Keep watching...

CAN'T GET ENOUGH DRIVEL DAYS!

Today Drivel Days Continues with a few great additions to site. Ironically, all new things happen to land in the Syndicate Press. Take a look at what's new today:

"If Ya Smell... What the Rock's Genetically Altering!"

The mystery of why mammals, humans in particular, have an oddly innate desire to choreograph and perform fake fights has finally been solved! Scientists from some country, probably in Europe, has discovered the "Wrestling Gene." Read the full story here!

The Cheap Alternative to Polygraph Testing

This classic article dates back to the first few weeks that the Syndicate was even alive. "How to tell if a Person is Lying - Six Easy Steps" is, as the title says, a great way to find out if a friend of yours is spitting a dirty, filthy lie right in your face. Read and be educated here.

Only a few days until the big birthday, February 25th!

MORE AND MORE DRIVEL DAYS!

Be happy even more, Syndicateers, because there is plenty more of Drivel Days on the way! Here's a summary of today's highlights:

Part of This Complete Breakfast

Back once again with his CRAZY inventions, Dr. S (as we call him, since nobody can prounounce his CRAZY name!!!) relates to us the story of his miserable failure during his first years working as a researcher. That's the spirit, Dr. S.! Read all about one of his less peculiar inventions in "The Bran-Ray."

Hey, Remember Me?

Charles Anderson, roving reporter for the Syndicate, has been out of the loop for a bit, but he's back in action again and reminding us just how great he is at digging up old crap and recycling it as new material. Yes, it's Mr. Anderson's first ever Syndicate article, "Trusted Diet Plan Failing Citizens," presented for your sentimental enjoyment!

More is still to come, so stay tuned!

DRIVEL DAYS!

At long last Drivel Days has arrived. Today we begin our week long celebration of the Reality Syndicate turning one year old! If you don't know what Drivel Days are yet, click here. Otherwise, take a look at what's new in the Syndicate as we kick of this shindig:

A Molded Piece of Green Plastic Can Make a Difference

Helping kick off Drivel Days and see to it that the celebration starts off on the right foot, we have Darren, the Drivel Days Dustpan to serve as the Syndicate's mascot! Not only does he do a great Woody Allen impression but he's a vital tool for tidying up during and after the party. Always remember, Darren says: "Enjoy Drivel Days and try not to spill anything!"

Did Somebody Say "Advice Columnist?"

Blorflax , Alien Ruler from Another World and Syndicate Advice Columnist has now returned with two more letters from people seeking his extraterrestrial wisdom. This week you can learn what Blorflax's family name is, and then call his home phone number in the Karundlian Nebula! Read all about it here.

From Beyond the Grave and Into Your Kitchen

Mr. Fred, Professional Zombie comes back with his third outstanding article, the second in his series of yummy recipes. That's right! After Death Cuisine II offers three new delectable treats. Now you can learn how to make Sugar Cookies (Zombie Style), Nauseating Cheese Balls, and "Coeur D'Artiste avec Clou." Oui! Read it all here.

What a way to kick off Drivel Days! Keep watching, because as the week goes on, more and more will come!

From the Land of Giants

A new game that's hot in the PC world right now is "Giants: Citizen Kabuto." Now featured in today's spotlight, Jason Cross offers an eye-opening look into this fascinating new game with an objective review. Read all about "Giants: Citizen Kabuto" here!

Drivel Days Descends in a Day!

That headline with so many "D" words said it all, while doing it with some snappy alliteration. Drivel Days is on it's way! The celebration of the sites first birthday is going to be huge, with countless new articles lined up, plus a few surprises. In addition, a grand yet mysterious unveiling of something big is planned to take place on the big day, February 25th. Want to know more about Drivel Days? Click Here!

CD Key Madness!

In the past few days a roar of Gamers has charged through the Syndicate. Do you play the "Game of the Year" First-Person-Shooter hit known as "Half Life?" If so, you know you need a CD Key. For all those pirates out there we've provided a little CD Key Generator to help your illegal version of this great game work (chances of our generator actually working: 564 quadrillion to one). Check it out here!

New Home Page Mascot Found Gnawing on Drywall

You may notice our paranoid snowman chum has taken his leave of absence to make way for Alberto, the Albino Valentine Mouse and the Syndicate's newest mascot. Isn't the way he clutches that tiny heart like a gas mask in a room filled with tear gas just darling? His vision is a little underdeveloped, so watch where you step...

Valentine's Day - Couples Scoff at Single People

Today is a sad, sad day for single people world wide. Valentine's Day is known as a day to be reminded of singlehood. In addition, greeting card companies tighten their iron grip on the public as they suck their wallets dry today. Ah, love. We here at the Syndicate haven't been struck by any stray arrows from Cupid, and we which all of our visitors the same.

Variety of Blood Pumping Organs Available

The newest update to the Syndicate Press today is just in time for tomorrow's Valentine's celebrations. Are you concerned your heart is inadequate for your personality? Would you prefer a heart of gold, ice, or vegetable matter? If you answered, "yes," "maybe," or "why did I come to this website?" you could benefit from reading "The Modern Types of the Heart."

Spam Email + Some Assembly = Stolen Cable TV?

Today in the Syndicate Press a third News Group Spot has popped up. If you've been on Usenet at all in the past few weeks you've probably seen a message describing how you can build your own cable TV de-scrambler. Now, with the help of the Reality Syndicate's Usenet Department, you can "GET CAUGHT BUILDING YOUR OWN C,A.,B,L;,E,..D.E.S;.C:R,;A,M-.B,L;E:,R'-"

What's in the News Today?

In the past few months every section of the Reality Syndicate has been revamped to look its best for the sites birthday. Today, the Syndicate Press has undergone some major changes. All articles are now divided up into sections, such as World, Science, The Arts, Economy, News Group Spots, and coming soon, Ads. For those of you who will miss the old look of the Syndicate Press, you can still view the articles by author if you like. Check it out here!

What Are Drivel Days?

At the beginning of this month "Drivel Days" was announced, and the only information beyond that was that whatever it was, it came at the end of this month. Now, to alleviate some anticipation, the Syndicate has released a special article to let all of you, our visitors, know a little bit more about what Drivel Days will be. Read it here!

The Illusion of Getting Paid While Online

Yesterday, the Syndicate Press was expanded slightly to include News Group spots that have been featured in select corners of Usenet. Today, we come to you with the second article ever sent out to spread the Reality Syndicate's words and ideas, "$$$ Another Faceless Get-Rich-Quick Scam $$$" If you've ever been offered a "Get Paid While Online" scam, you'll enjoy this.

How to Throw Away Money Without Really Trying

To increase the Syndicate's popularity, occasional spots are run in News Groups depicting the satirical disgust that the Reality Syndicate occasionally has for the Internet. Now, for the first time ever, the Syndicate Press is home to these News Group spots. Check out the first spot ever, "Throw Your Money Down the Toilet! Today!"

Advice Columnist Returns Heroically

It has been over a month since Blorflax was last seen around the Syndicate. December 31 is a day that will live forever in infamy for the green alien. In his newest article, Blorflax answers a letter from an unfortunate character with an affection for amphibians, while also explaining his mysterious month long disappearance. Read the twisted tale here!

Fresh New Writer Hits the Syndicate

Francis Williams is a name that all Syndicate Go-ers will soon come to love. Francis debuts as the newest Syndicate Press writer with article #1, "Don't Blame Me, I Didn't Vote for Him." Read all about the oldest political system known to anthropologists and how hunting armadillos on Saturday seemed to rub one caveman the wrong way. Read the full story here!

The Spotlight Widens

At the Reality Syndicate we like to keep our newest and freshest articles right up front for all to see, or as we call it, "In the Spotlight." As we've now expanded to three writers, coupled with the approaching "Drivel Days" (more on that later), the articles are starting to come too fast. To alleviate blockage, four articles are now filling the spotlight every day instead of two. Enjoy!

When a Happy Face Can't Take it Anymore

In Charles Anderson's Latest report, psychologists have charted the crippling disorder of Happy Face Nuero-Emotional Breakdown Syndrome. This affliction affects over six million Happy Faces every year in America alone. This informative report not only brings you comprehensive details of each phase in this disorder but what you can do to protect yourself and loved ones. Read it all here.

Small Fury Mammal Day!

At the Syndicate we know today is Groundhog Day, one of the most peculiar holidays ever to hit the calendar year. We prefer not to discriminate against other fury little mammals that resemble groundhogs, such as the elegant wombat. You can read about wombats and their distaste for dairy products in Yurivich Gruskenvald's first guest column, Why Wombats Don't Like Cheese.

A Preview of Things to Come

Here's a sneak preview of just some of the things we have planned for the month of February:

• Charles Anderson's latest report on Happy Face Psychology
• Blorflax's newest barrage of advice to morons worldwide
• The Syndicate Robots
• From the Gifted Hand of Mr. William Rutherford, Author and Inventor: "Of Machineries and Metals, an Account of a Conversation"
• Drivel Days!
• More on the mysterious ego pages...?

Look for these great things and much more, all month long!