General News Archives for October, 2001

 

October 24, 2001

The Truth About the Afterlife

Zombies have active imaginations.Are you breathing? If so, chances are good you're alive. If not, you're most likely what scientists call dead. Well, in today's Guest Columns, Mr. Fred, Professional Zombie puts to rest some misconceptions the living have about the dead in a viciously truthful report using polls as a tool of accuracy. The dead enjoy cuddling with fuzzy things and wouldn't mind transparent bananas! Check out The Latest Polls Show... for more details!

 

October 23, 2001

Straight from the Mouth of the Migraine!!!

Although my expression appears to be the same, I am infact excited!News Flash! Ladies and gentlemen, we are more than proud to present an exclusive interview opportunity with the lead singer and head songwriter of Cringing Migraine, Mr. Jimmy Fringe. Not a whole lot is known about this enigmatic fellow, and interviews with him are rare if not non-existent. So head on over to the Cringing Migraine page, and be the first on your block to experience this exclusive interview sound byte!

 

October 17, 2001

The Heart of a Rodent

He's so cute with that little heart.New in the Mascot Archives today is the tale of one little mammal that, despite his underdeveloped vision, managed to rise to the ranks of a bona fide Syndicate Mascot. It's Alberto the Albino Valentine Mouse! He was around for a while last February and now hear the real story about this little guy, including is crude behavior and slanderous comments. Check it out here.

 

October 16, 2001

Mysteries of Animation Solved

This is Beany.  He gets operated on against his will.In the Syndicate Press today, Chris Clark looks deep into the strange mystery behind the eyes of cartoon characters always being visible, no matter the light level. With one impatient British cartoon, a few experiments, and even a dissection, answers are found. Check out the whole story in Cartoon Eyes Vs. Total Darkness!

Article Count Nearing Triple Digits

With today's latest article, the Reality Syndicate can now boast the fact that it has 90 wondrous articles for the public to partake of. This count comes from combining all content in the Syndicate Press, Guest Columns, and Mascot Archives. This means within days the Syndicate will have it's 100th Article! You can keep track at home with the handy little counter now on the left side of this very page.

 

October 15, 2001

What Halloween Never Sees a Pumpkin?

He's one happy veggie.True, the Syndicate has a spooky mascot for the coming Eve of Hallows or whatever the heck this holiday can so be called. Anyone remember the spooky mascot for 2000? It so happened to be Kevin, the Halloween Pumpkin! Yes, this fellow is feature in the Mascot Archives today with a wonderful story telling of how he got involved in mascotting and how he also knows how to play quite a few musical instruments. One talented pumpkin, this one. Check out his story here.

 

October 14, 2001

Banana Time!

Woo!  Fruit based computer companies!We've got a treat for you today, kids! In today's Syndicate Press Chris Clark meets with Norman Gerbels, mastermind behind Banana Computers. Check out some of these hot new devices ranging from work stations to handheld organizers to virtual reality helmets. Get a breakdown of each devices features and everything in Banana Computers!

 

October 13, 2001

The Syndicate Gets Spooky

Yes, I'm owned by a witch. Nothing to be ashamed of.That poor attempt at alliteration in a headline says it all! Today the Syndicate is proud to welcome its Eleventh mascot, Carlos the Witch's Broom. This guy was actually a part of our janitorial staff and his past being associated with witches made him fully qualified for the scary October mascot position. With any luck you can read his story in the Mascots Section when it shows up in the next few days!

 

October 12, 2001

Days of Silence

Sorry about this period of nothingness, folks! Demanding jobs can be quite... demanding. But hey, buck up! Today the Syndicate comes back with a great article loaded with pretty colorful pictures. Enjoy.

Digging for Dollars

It makes a big boom...In today's Guest Columns, Syndicate Reporter Charles Anderson is back with a peek into America's primary source of income: Buried Treasure. After explaining this odd economic factor and the geology behind it Anderson dives even deeper by giving tips on how average Joe American can get his hands on some of the Earth bound booty. Check it out in Treasure, Treasure, Everywhere!

 

October 2, 2001

October Makes a Splash

A new month has arrived and that means brand new stuff to look at and be mildly amused by! Besides the fact that this month is the one marking the one year birthday of the Archives section, here's a look at what else is planned to debut in October:

  • More hit songs from Cringing Migraine
  • A look into the world of Banana Computers
  • More advice from Guest Columnist Blorflax
  • A look at new technology in Half Life Modifications
  • Charles Anderson's latest report on buried treasure
  • Talking brains that live in aquariums

And so much more! Don't miss one bit of it. That's an order.

 

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