After Death Cuisine II - Recipe #1 By Mr. Fred, Professional Zombie

Sugar Cookies (Zombie Style)

Necessary Ingredients for a batch of 36 Cookies:

Flour - 2 cups Cinnamon - 3 Tbsp. 24 Metric Tons Eggs - 1/2 dozen

Water - 1 Cup Butter - 3 Sticks Milk - 2 cups Advil Tablets - 300 count

Step 1

Gather your ingredients and preheat your oven to 500 degrees. Use one stick of butter to butter a large cookie tin. Mix the remaining two sticks, along with flour, water, milk, and eggs (throw the shells in for fun) in a large mixing bowl until fully whipped.

Step 2

Smash all of your advil tablets into a fine powder. Stir 24 metric tons of sugar and your advil powder together until fully mixed. 24 metric tons of sugar may be hard to come by, but absolutely necessary. Zombies love sugar.

Step 3

Add your sugar/advil powder to your mixture from step one. Mix well. If all is done correctly so far, you should no be standing before a mountain of slightly moist sugar with a twinge of advil. You now need to make 36 cookie sized lumps out of this mountain. I suggest using a Gravometric Compression System to force the sugar to become so dense. Place all 36 lumps on the cookie sheet and place in the oven for 30-40 minutes.

Step 4

Once the compressed disks of sugar are golden brown on the outside, remove your cookie tray. Sprinkle your cinnamon lightly and delicately over the tops of each cookie.

That's it! I think you'll find these treats to be delicious, that is, if you can bite into them without shattering your jaw. Also, I warn you, be careful around these cookies. Their extreme quantities of mass in such a tiny amount of volume give them quite a powerful gravitational pull! If you feel your body being painfully stretched when your near these cookies, back away at an escape velocity of twelve MPH, or greater.

Proceed to the Next Recipe!