Cyber
War is Peace
By the Minister of Propaganda |
 |
 Greetings
Comrades. I am Minister of Propaganda for the Reality Syndicate. It is
my personal responsibility as Minister of Propaganda that I make sure
all visitors to the Reality Syndicate are well informed and obedient.
If you're a new visitor, I suggest you read my first two articles, Knowledge
Crimes and How Not to Commit Them, and The
Webmaster is Watching You. Now, as you read, remember this: If ever
you have a question or a complaint about anything I say, e-mail the complaint
department at admission_of_guilt@reality-syndicate.com.
Let's
Begin.
War. Our
beloved site, led by the glorious Webmaster, may or may not be at war
at this very moment. What should you do if war were to be suddenly declared?
Irrelevant. There's one basic rule for the mentality of the proletariat:
If we're at war, we've always been at war.
 Cyber
warfare is most commonly waged through an aggressive email campaign toward
the contact addresses of the enemy. Belligerent emails can range in content
from "You are not good" to "We don't like you" and
can be sent in massive waves totaling up to five total messages. In the
event of a mail attack, a lack of a counterattack, or even a lack of a
response, signifies victory.
Now, why
would such a benign, peaceful, loving, generous site such as this unleash
the fury of hell on opposing sites? Put simply, the enemy is evil. Pure
evil. Pure, refined, filtered, and freebased evil. Evil so evil that...
you get the idea. Here's a list of evil sites that have been ravaged and
wiped clean from the face of the Internet by the Reality Syndicate:
- The Dominion of
Death
- Fascism Weekly
- Death to the Syndicate
Online
- Amazon.com
 Victory
was swift, brutal, and absolute for us, as it always has been and always
will be. If the Syndicate goes to war with a profoundly evil adversary,
here's how you can pitch in:
- Horde aluminum and
rubber.
- Send malicious emails
to the enemy, and include attachments of annoying surveys and questionable
images.
- Break into the enemy's
servers and wipe out any and all files you come across.
- Find your way onto
national TV and speak of the evils of the enemy.
- If you work for
the enemy, quit without giving two weeks notice.
Be creative, and never
let the enemy gain knowledge of the movements or strategies of the Syndicate.
If you should happen to accidentally let any information slide, or if
you know any political dissidents within the Syndicate, or if you sympathize
with the enemy and believe the wrath of the Syndicate should be less than
84%, or if you were once affiliated with the enemy but would like to join
the ranks of the Syndicate, please contact myself or my staff at admission_of_guilt@reality-syndicate.com.
If you would like to
contact the Webmaster and give him suggestions on how to create a better
society, please direct those suggestions to admission_of_guilt@reality-syndicate.com.
VIOLENCE IS
LOVE
INDEPENDENCE IS FAILURE
THE SYNDICATE IS TRUTH
-The Minister
of Propaganda
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